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Chapter 2: Caravan of love

So the time finally came for our first foreign holiday!! Pwllheli a caravan park in North Wales happy days and were getting the boat. Harry couldn’t make as he had important pressing issues to deal with in the pub, but we went with my uncle Jonnies family. We all loved Jonny he was a character but we later lost him to alcoholism and died very young. I was 14 at the time and I wanted to get a tray of beer in the duty free so I had to ask Keith and Jonny but they said I was too young so I thought they needed a little persuading. I went down to the duty free and robed two lovely Jean Philippi watches and a bottle of Jack Daniels. I brought my offering to the two Kings and against their high moral standards and better judgment they accepted as long as it was kept quiet. So I was all set for my holiday with my tray of beer and new clobber (clothes) I got off Harry that weekend. When we arrived we got changed and walked into the town, Me, Keith, Steo and Jonny went into the local karaoke which we later named the Jon yoke he went every day and sang the same song “I did it my way” by Frank Sinatra, while me Ma my aunty Chris and girls went shopping and to a talent show. On the way down we passed two girls that were staying beside us Jane and Clare. They came in with their curly hair and fringe hair sprayed up like an 80’s girl band, chewing gum and twirling it around their little fingers. They sat down and Clare whispered that Jane liked me would I walk her home? I knew the caravan was empty and id my tray of tenants was under the bed. She walked outside I followed a minute later like a snake going out not to be noticed, we chatted and had a laugh I asked her back to the caravan for a drink, I was 14 and a very determined virgin to have a story for the lads. We had a few cans and started kissing and it took me about 45 minutes to strip her as id no idea what I was doing, I whipped of my Dunne’s jocks and got on the floor with her she lay there probably waiting for an amazing experience but I found it a little difficult, it was like playing snooker with a rope, trying to bend it in and not sure where it was going, with that the caravan door flew open with the breeze. I jumped up to grab the door to close it and left my fingers in the other side and closed the door on them, I nearly chopped my fingers off they were black and blue but I held in the pain as Jane was still lying on the floor in the nip with her eyes closed and very little movement I jumped back on and eventually found my way in, 30 seconds later I was a man. Looking back now losing my virginity to in a caravan isn’t one of my better days but we were very young and clueless and she was hotty!

Reflection

Looking back on our first holiday can’t help to think of my Dads absence and the only role models were my uncle and older brother who I had to manipulate to get my alcohol. In my eyes this was the way forward in life to be a character that drinks and steals to get attention in any way possible. Losing my virginity in a caravan with no boundaries or fear of getting her pregnant. I can imagine sitting in Freud’s chair and him exploring my behaviour using the iceberg concept or even worse his Psychosexual Theory !! which il explain soon.

Sigmund Freud and Psychoanalysis

Sigmund Freud was born in 1856 in Moravia, but was brought to Vienna by his parents at the age of 4 lived there until his flight to England after the German annexation of Austria in 1938. This was at the height of German power during the second World War as he was jewish. He worked initially on the nervous system but became most recognised for his work on the unconscious mind which we know today as psychoanalysis.
On the surface is consciousness, which consists of those thoughts that are the focus of our attention now, and this is seen as the tip of the iceberg. The preconscious consists of all which can be retrieved from memory. The third and most significant region is the unconscious. Here lie the processes that are the real cause of most behaviour. Like an iceberg, the most important part of the mind is the part you cannot see. So unconsciously is real cause of my behaviour the part I couldn’t see or control or so I thought , if you ask any drug addict they will tell you they don’t know why there addicted they just can’t stop it’s like a powerful force driving you and your a passenger to an emotionally suppressed rollercoaster.

Freud found that some events and desires were often too frightening or painful for his patients to acknowledge, and believed such information was locked away in the unconscious mind. This happens through the process of repression.
Freud emphasized the importance of the unconscious mind, and a primary assumption of Freudian theory is that the unconscious mind governs behaviour to a greater degree than people suspect. Indeed, the goal of psychoanalysis is to make the unconscious conscious.
I find Freud very amusing and indebt but a total nutcase and he one of the most renowned and controversial psychologists. Sure who doesn’t love a bit of madness? Freud emphasized the importance of the unconscious mind, and a primary assumption of Freudian theory is that the unconscious mind governs behaviour to a greater degree than people suspect. Indeed, the goal of psychoanalysis is to make the unconscious conscious, which I do find fascinating. I think this discovery opened the door to many future great minds. This discovery of the mind was his masterpiece and I can’t argue with him it gives a lot of understanding to my mindset through my addiction.
Psychosexual Theory
Freud believed that children are born with a libido – a sexual (pleasure) urge. There are a number of stages of childhood, during which the child seeks pleasure from a different ‘object’. Which by objects he means sources of pleasure, Freud argued that children then passed through a stage in which they fixated on the mother as a sexual object (known as the Oedipus Complex) but that the child eventually overcame and repressed this desire because of its taboo nature(Seriously Sigmund ??) I seriously dispute this claim as I think as humans we can identify emotionally on many levels but this one isn’t the case. Freud confessed to being in love with his mother and jealous of his father, he recollected his sexual arousal in infancy by his nurse and he remembered seeing his mother naked during a train journey. So I think his physosexual theory is compromised by his personal experience but most definitely isn’t norm.
Cocaine
As a medical researcher, Freud was an early user and proponent of cocaine as a stimulant as. He wrote several articles on the antipressant qualities of the drug. How dedicated was he willing to studying this so rigorously while having a few lines and taken notes.
Freud felt that cocaine would work as a cure for many conditions and wrote a well-received paper, “On Coca”, explaining its virtues. He prescribed it to his friends to help them overcome morphine addiction. Freud also recommended cocaine to many of his close family and friends. I think he be a doctor in demand these days as cocaine prices have gone through the roof since the death of Pablo. You have to love this man that promotes cocaine as a cure while having sex with your mother.

“The mind is like an iceberg, it floats with one-seventh of its bulk above water.”
Sigmund

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CIARAN MAY

Ancient Knowledge

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